Obama the GP

The words of US President Barack Obama during his inauguration this week might well have been said by a GP to his LPs. Here we present an abridged version, with PERE translations.

I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed. [Thanks for re-upping]

At these moments, we have carried on not simply because of skill or vision … but because we have remained … true to our founding documents. [No style drift here, thanks very much]

That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood. [It took us by surprise too]

Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real.  They are serious and they are many.  They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. [We need to manage down your return expectations]

On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear. [Actually, we have to hold this dreadful annual meeting]

It has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things – some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labour, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. [We are trying to rescue our bad deals. We haven’t just been sitting on our hands]

But our time of standing pat … and putting off unpleasant decisions – that time has surely passed. [We are going to have to actually invest some of this equity you gave us … gulp]

For everywhere we look, there is work to be done. The state of the economy calls for action, bold and swift, and we will act. [Not sure how yet, but we will think of something]

This crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control. [Lucky we didn’t take on too much debt in 2007]

Earlier generations … knew that our power grows through its prudent use; guided by these principles once more, we can meet … new threats that demand even greater effort – even greater cooperation and understanding. [Let’s not fall out over LP terms]

For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness. [Look at our track record – we used to be good]

Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. [We don’t really know how to take advantage of the opportunities out there]

But those values upon which our success depends – hard work and honesty, courage and fair play… these things are old. What is demanded … is a return to these truths. [Trust us, we’re nice guys]

Let us mark this day with remembrance, of who we are and how far we have travelled. The capital was abandoned [but] with hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come. [Fingers crossed]